 Bad Ass Problemo |
AnonymousAZ
Newbie
Registration Date: 10-01-2009
Posts: 2
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So , as of now, my father has cancer. Was just in the hospital. The man is guna die. prostate cancer, deep int eh bones, not reatment to cure. prostate cancer kills 1/4 men.
I fight with him still though. i am unemployed just got fired before xmas, I live here with my sister too. she is only 2 years young then me, and just like him, both fight with me. he's a short tempered man since i was born, he hit me a lot , my mom divorced him, she doesn't like him either, no love between them.
well, i want to move out and not longer have to take care of him, and leave my sister to clean up his puke, make his meals, and take the abuse. does this make me bad. i would move to where we have work. we're getting kicked out of our place now anyways, just because of some by-law that the landlord got hit with.
He is on barley enough now to get by. i sleep on a couch, my sister took my room, since i lived here a year early then her, we never really lived with my dad since the divorce when i was 8. i am over 22 now. just moved in on my 22nd birthday.
i don't know what to do. i can't get along with them. he's coming home from the hospital, back home. he can't really leave the house in his current condition even.
can you guys help me out. i just don't know if staying to take care of the man i didn't want to see at one point in my life because of his cruelty, when i was about 12.
or should i stay with him and try to help him until the day he dies, postponing my life. which has just started. and is wasting away.
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10-01-2009 21:13 |
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Airfull
Sexy Lady
Registration Date: 09-11-2002
Posts: 2,455
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Well...
Seems like you have a lot of problems right now, and a lot of things the deal with!
Maybe you should/have to take care of you dad...but offcourse if you can't...I quess no one will blame you but yourself...(maybe not now, but in a few years(maybe))
The last thing you can do for the men..even though you are not the best mates!
It is your choice..nobody else can make it for you!
Maybe talk to your sister?
What does she think about all this?
I don't think that taking care of your dad is time being wasted away!
when u are older and have kids you'll realise that is very valiable! to have people who love you( even though he left you and your mother)
maybe try to look at him as being just a person....who needs help...and u are the one who can give him that!
search for Gentle teaching and existential loyalty (nagy)
I hope you your sisted and your father will be fine!
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ONE BULLET? TWO BULLETS? THE THIRT ONE IS THROUGH MY HEAD!
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11-01-2009 01:23 |
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cynik 
Cp6uja
Registration Date: 15-03-2005
Posts: 5,646
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points to take into account:
you could have easily been just another splat on the floor along with all of your unborn brothers and sisters but you were not and the sole fact youre his son and noone else
he was going to die anyway and theres no escaping that. if he hit you he didnt kill you. so theres no need being warm to him now, but thats no reason to abandon him altogether. he is weak and dying and has noone else to turn to. revenge does not apply here
solution is getting along with your sister no matter what you choose because:
you wont be blaming yourself like Airfull said
both of you have a life to live long after hes gone and all the troubles life brings are far easier together
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https://soundcloud.com/tsai-vidro-voves
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12-01-2009 07:47 |
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BattleDrone
2161... the future.
Registration Date: 30-12-2005
Posts: 6,413
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If you do care 1% about him you should at least leave him a chance to make up for past mistakes. If you don't do that you might regret it for the rest of your life.
Keep it up man. It's the kind of stuff everyone has to go through sooner or later.
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 Check my soundcloud (exclusive tracks on there)
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12-01-2009 09:17 |
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CULTURE BOY
v v v iv a record missing
Registration Date: 12-01-2007
Posts: 1,415
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cant really give any advice on this matter cos i hate my dad so thats that
all i can say mate is keep ya head up n do what ya feel is right. only you can make that choice.
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www.myspace.com/cultureboydnb
soundcloud
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12-01-2009 11:35 |
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AnonymousAZ
Newbie
Registration Date: 10-01-2009
Posts: 2
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Well, thanks for your advice. It certainly helped a lot at that time. I talked with him and we both had a very emotional moment and cried and hugged and said we loved eachother.
the next day he passed on.
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13-01-2009 16:02 |
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Halph-Price
Zombie Algorithm
Registration Date: 22-12-2004
Posts: 6,160
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i am so sorry to hear that
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13-01-2009 17:09 |
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Airfull
Sexy Lady
Registration Date: 09-11-2002
Posts: 2,455
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Ow, sorry to hear that!
I'm sure you did the right thing! Maybe your dad found his peace of mind and so he was ready to go...
all the best!
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ONE BULLET? TWO BULLETS? THE THIRT ONE IS THROUGH MY HEAD!
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15-01-2009 21:54 |
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